Finding Joy in Perimenopause: How to Make This Season Empowering (and Not Suck)

Finding Joy in Perimenopause: A Real-Life Guide to Feeling Good Again

Let’s Be Honest: Perimenopause Has a PR Problem

Somewhere between hot flashes, mood swings, and random chin hairs, the world decided that perimenopause should be whispered about like a scandal. We’ve been trained to see it as a slow fade into irrelevance — a time to shrink, stay quiet, and basically just hold on until it’s over.

Nope. Not here. Not us.

Because here’s the truth: Perimenopause is not a curse — it’s a reckoning. A shift. A wake-up call. And, believe it or not, it can also be a joyful, empowering, even freeing experience — if we let it.

So let’s talk about how to find the joy, own the chaos, and actually feel better in the middle of what most people call a hormonal horror show.

Step 1: Redefine What This Season Means to You

We’ve been told perimenopause = decline. But what if it’s actually an upgrade?

No more periods on vacation. No more saying yes when you mean hell no. No more pretending you’re fine when you’re not. This season can be a portal to:

• Deeper self-trust

• Better boundaries

• Rediscovering your voice

• Refocusing on you (after years of putting everyone else first)

• Letting go of who you “should” be and embracing who you actually are

Take a few minutes to journal what you want this phase to look and feel like. Make it personal. Then begin building habits, routines, and relationships that move you toward that.

The joy starts when we stop seeing perimenopause as a “problem to fix” and start seeing it as a rebirth to navigate.

Step 2: Honor Your Body (Even When She’s Loud)

Yes, your body is changing. No, you’re not broken. In fact, your body is talking louder because she wants to be heard — maybe for the first time in decades.

Joy doesn’t mean “feeling amazing all the time.” It means tuning in, responding with care, and knowing you deserve to feel supported. Start here:

• Eat more protein. Women in midlife need more protein to maintain muscle mass and regulate hormones. Aim for 100+ grams per day (yes, really). Spread it out over all meals.

  
  

• Move your body with purpose. Lifting weights is one of the best things you can do for bone density, metabolic health, and mental resilience. Pair it with walking, stretching, or dancing to keep things joyful and sustainable.

  
  

• Prioritize sleep hygiene. Try magnesium glycinate, cut late-night scrolling, and keep your bedroom cool. Consider sleep-supporting supplements like L-theanine or tart cherry juice.

  
  

• Hydrate like a boss. Even mild dehydration can worsen fatigue and mood swings. Aim for at least 80 oz of water a day and limit alcohol, which can mess with your hormones and your sleep.

  
  

• Track your symptoms. Use an app or journal to notice patterns. Knowledge is power — and tracking can help you connect dots, advocate for yourself, and feel more in control.

The joy? It creeps in when you realize that taking care of yourself is not selfish — it’s

revolutionary.

Step 3: Burn the Rulebook — and Write a New One

Midlife is when the BS filters fall away. So let’s go all in:

• You’re allowed to say no without guilt.

• You can quit the job, cut the hair, leave the relationship, launch the dream.

• You can want more sex, less sex, different sex — or none at all.

• You can wear red lipstick to the PTA meeting or leave the house makeup-free.

This is your time to ask yourself: Who am I when I’m not trying to please everyone else?

Make a list of 5 rules you’ve been following that no longer serve you — and then, one by one, break them. Replace them with rules that reflect your real values and desires.

That’s not midlife rebellion — that’s midlife freedom.

Step 4: Create Daily Joy Rituals (Yes, Even If You’re Busy)

You don’t need a silent retreat or a Himalayan salt lamp to feel better. Joy lives in the everyday moments you reclaim:

• Morning coffee on the porch — phone-free.

• A 10-minute solo dance party to your favorite throwback playlist.

• Journaling what you’re grateful for and what’s pissing you off.

• Saying “no” to plans that drain you, and “yes” to ones that light you up.

• Ending your day with a wind-down routine — warm tea, lavender oil, a book that makes you feel alive.

Start by identifying one joyful thing you can do daily in five minutes or less. Make it non-negotiable. Repeat.

It’s not about perfection. It’s about pattern disruption. Choose one small, consistent joy practice and let it change your chemistry.

Step 5: Find (or Build) Your People

The fastest joy-killer in perimenopause? Feeling like you’re going through it alone.

You’re not. Promise. You just need to find the people who aren’t afraid to talk about night sweats, shifting moods, and pelvic floor exercises at brunch.

Whether it’s an online group, a real-life friend, or one ride-or-die text chain — find your humans. Or create the space you wish existed.

Tips for finding or building your community:

• Join a women’s wellness group, virtual or local

• Start a book club around midlife health, mindset, or self-development

• Follow and engage with menopause-positive creators on social media

• Be the one to break the ice — you’d be surprised how many women are craving the same thing

• Connection = medicine. Joy lives there, too.

Step 6: Choose Curiosity Over Catastrophe

When a symptom pops up (hello, brain fog or boob soreness out of nowhere), you get to choose:

• Panic? Spiral? Google your way into oblivion?

• OR pause, breathe, and say: “Huh. What’s my body trying to tell me?”

This mindset shift is everything.

Curiosity creates space for compassion. It makes room for solutions. It helps you navigate change without feeling like a victim of it.

Journal prompts to shift into curiosity:

• What’s different today and why?

• What helps me feel grounded when things feel chaotic?

• What do I need more of — or less of — right now?

Being curious instead of critical is a practice. Start now.

Step 7: Laugh. Seriously. Laugh More.

If you can’t laugh at waking up drenched in sweat or crying over a dropped spoon, what even are we doing?

Laughter isn’t frivolous. It’s healing. It literally reduces cortisol, boosts endorphins, and reconnects you to joy.

Ideas to invite more laughter:

• Rewatch your favorite ridiculous sitcom (Golden Girls and Schitt’s Creek are top-tier)

• Follow funny midlife creators on TikTok or Instagram

• Text a friend and swap “what the hell just happened to my body today?” stories

• Let yourself be silly. Dance badly. Tell the bad joke. Laugh at the absurdity of it all.

Humor softens the edges of this experience — and makes it way more fun.

You Don’t Have to Love Every Moment to Find Joy in It

Perimenopause isn’t about forcing positivity. It’s about creating moments of power, pleasure, and peace despite the mess.

Joy is in your choices. Your rituals. Your community. Your ability to say, “This is hard — and I’m still showing up for myself.”

Because you deserve to feel vibrant, seen, and alive — not just someday, but right now.

This is not a crisis. It’s a recalibration.

So here’s your permission slip to stop shrinking, start shining, and remember: midlife isn’t the end of anything.

It’s the beginning of you.